Two Great Spiritual Reads

A few weeks ago I read a book that changed my life. Completely. I (unfortunately) have a tendency to edit as I read and wonder why people made certain decisions in their writing, but on this book I looked past all of that and stopped caring. It is written with the Spirit: amazing. Each page uplifts and edifies as a result, regardless of writing style or organization. It's one everyone should read, I can't even offer a decent summary. Such a humble, inspiring work. Wesley and I have made some life/family changes because of it. That's a powerful book.

Point: Read F. Enzio Busche's book, Yearning for the Living God (edited by Tracie Lamb).

This morning I finished Neal A. Maxwell's Not My Will, But Thine. Also lovely, but perhaps organized more intellectually. I thoroughly enjoy Maxwell because his work is quick to read as well as full of things to mull over. I find myself still refering to his ideas and insights years after I have read them. One that stood out from this book:
"What we feel on that occasion will be God's and Jesus' perfect love for us--not a scolding sterness but a profound kindness and immense tenderness. As these virtues flow from them toward us, many will feel the scalding shame of not having returned that love. As we feel their perfect love, we will confess that the justice and mercy of God are likewise perfect."

Isn't lovely that mortality is a matter of developing? I've been thinking a lot lately on how life demands more of our bodies and spirits than they are capable of handling, and yet we are upheld. Sleep deprived, over- or under-worked, strained--our lives are hungry, starved in a variety of ways at different times. But on earth, we refine our soul, we combine the worth and strength of both body and spirit, we daily discover what it means to be mortal and sometimes glimpse the greatness God sees in us.

Of Ivanhoe, Titles, and Foils

I'm in a book club with my sisters and mom. We read Ivanhoe in October. Since I'm behind in my book logging, I thought I'd start with this review. More to come.
Despite my first suprise at not hearing the name "Ivanhoe" until chapter 5, I thoroughly enjoyed the book (note here that I listened to the entire thing--so when it comes to names, etc., I don't have any spelling references!). I determined early on that male authors--at least our friend Sir Walter--of that time period should not spend pages describing clothing since even after lengthy anecdotes of feathers and furs, most of the characters fall into categories of class but are rarely distinguishable otherwise. With that acknolwedged, I do love Wamba--in his jester cap or disguised as a friar.


Throughout the novel I considered why Ivanhoe was the title character. He had few appearances, no real show of valor or strength, and primarily background information (rather than current since he was in secrecy then wounded). The book spent equal time with Wamba and the swineherd, more with Locksley/Robin Hood, and a decent amount with Cedric, Friar Tuck, and the celebrated Black Knight/King Richard. I felt that ultimately, the cast centralized around Rebecca. Rebecca revealed imperfections and virtues, desires and constraints, weakness of person and station but strength of spirit. Her affection for Ivanhoe is really where the reader sees the most of him. As a literary tool, Rebecca's main problem was that she proved Rowena to be a surface character: limited, again, to a vague description of beauty and heritage. At the conclusion of the novel, although we are told Rowena and Ivanhoe live happily, I could almost sense Sir Walter's wish that he had allowed Ivanhoe and Rebecca to somehow end up together. Alas, she a Jewess and he a crusader.

Ultimately, I think Ivanhoe is the proper title character because all of the events and other characters hinge on his existance. While the story only briefly touches on him, it could not happen without him. Cedric and Rowena probably would not have attended the tournament without the initial argument about/with Ivanhoe. Isaac might not have survived (more than once). Brian would have persued Rowena. The Black Knight would not have interfered as he did. Sweet Gurth never would have achieved freedom. Rebecca's champion would not have materialized. In addition to physical events, the emotions and motives of the characters relied on the established goodness and solidity of Ivanhoe. At least as a catalyst.

Six Months Along...

When I was six months along with Levi we tried to make a double layer cake that looked like a ninja turtle.

Alas.

And I very proudly showed off my burgeoning belly.



At six months with Urias, our double layer cakes have improved but still need help.

And I feel huge (much bigger than the picture shows), though I still very happily display our newest addition (edition?).



Weird how similar the two pictures look. I'm actually not a long hair person or a pink person. Maybe it's a result of being surrounded by boys!

Dancing

Finally recorded this after fighting it for three days. This version is a bit milder since he was tuckered out from climbing up and up and shrieking happily as his mom ran to grab him. Now we've captured history, we'll move on!

Realized the last few days that we take pictures of Levi, but not many of ourselves. I've been trying to come up with a headshot that doesn't look too awkward or too close to fourteen. No success as of yet.

Mercy

Yesterday swirled, at home and definitely outside of home.

Amazing how Heavenly Father knows us individually and shows His love in interesting ways. I had a very tender experience after Levi smeared his face, body, and the kitchen with his breakfast, screamed all morning and found the borders of my patience and capacities. We sat in the rocking chair to sing songs and calm down. He whimpered and I tried not to feel harried.

Then I had an overwhelming feeling of I can do this. Not that I felt hopeless. Not that I had really considered other options. I just knew I had spiritual support and angels. I knew that I could be cheerful and patient and happy and teach my children even on long days. I was surprised at the change of emotions and the onrush of comfort.

Once I lay Levi down, I received the text from Wes: "Classes cancelled today. Gunman was in the library. I'm working on INL stuff. I'm okay. Don't worry." Most days I am prone to panic--it doesn't have to be big. As I thought about the horrific possibilities and the terrible situation on UT's campus, I realized that I felt the overwhelming peace at the same time Wesley sent his text. Not only was I bouyed up about motherhood and my individual purpose, but I was prepared to hear and respond wisely to the news.

All day I prayed for the family and friends of the student with the assault rifle. I can't (and don't want to) imagine getting to that point of dispair and hopelessness. I prayed for the people on campus. I prayed that others could feel the tender mercies of the Lord that I so often overlook.

I reflected on how blessed I am and how quickly our lives pass. Day by day and sometimes it is just gone. There might be a morning when Wesley leaves and we don't see each other again. There will someday be a last morning, a last kiss, a last farewell in mortality--but the Plan of Salvation is real and we will be together eternally with our family. What a miraculous gift. How merciful is our God.

Grateful

Usually Levi hates being naked if not in the tub, but we left his shoes on while we cleaned up a big accident yesterday. He loves his shoes. This reminds me of the song, "The Streak": "Nothin' on but his Keds..."

Learning to use utensils is fun. The kitchen was in the same condition.

Outside!

Words of Inspiration

Every day that Wesley rides the bus to campus he memorizes something--usually a scripture, but also things like all the verses to "The Star-Spangled Banner," poems, and the new Duty to God requirements. I've decided I need to actively learn every day and I miss memorizing, so I've been memorizing a few small things also. Over the last three days I memorized the Relief Society theme--oh, it's great.

"We are beloved spirit daughters of God and our lives have meaning, purpose, and direction. As a worldwide sisterhood we are united in our devotion to Jesus Christ, our Savior and Exemplar. We are women of faith, virtue, vision, and charity who:

Increase our testimonies of Jesus Christ through prayer and scripture study.

Seek spiritual strength by following the promptings of the Holy Ghost.

Devote ourselves to strengthening marriages, families, and homes.
Find nobility in motherhood and joy in womanhood.

Delight in service and good works.

Love live and learning.

Stand for truth and righteousness.

Sustain the priesthood as the authority of God on earth.

Rejoice in the blessings of the temple, understand our divine destiny, and strive for exaltation."

I have a long way to go before achieving all of this--particularly "understanding [my] divine destiny" on a daily basis. I usually delight in service and good works, but there are times when I get distracted by activities rather than focusing on people...Basically, there are days when I can hit on a few of these and days when I really need to find my start button. I want to live worthy of such goals and become a woman of "faith, virtue, vision, and charity" who knows my heritage to Heavenly Parents and honors them in my daily life.