I’m a little late writing this, so it will be even more scatter-brained than usual! But the week was so exciting, it’s worth recording.

Before school the boys cut out varying sizes and colors of tails and taped them to the back of their pants. Lincoln was a ring-tailed lemur, the rest (including Venice) were fossas. Levi wore his until it bent when he sat in his chair, then he carried it in his pocket and let it dangle. After we took Levi to school on Monday, Keller and Lincoln changed out of their clothes and into new pajamas and wore them all day. We worked outside and played, then Keller put himself down for a nap. “Goodnight, Mom. Goodnight, Lincoln. Goodnight Veni!” We pulled out our kid-sized card table and had an “etiquette snack time” to practice asking for food, using napkins, etc. We’ll have to repeat this activity for, oh..the rest of our lives. We enjoyed it though. We’ve had pie pumpkins that the boys drew on and an acorn squash out on the dining table just for festivities. Venice finds ways to get the squash then carries it everywhere. I’ve found it under the piano, up the stairs, behind couches. She loved it and was very sad when I finally cooked it. Levi gave our FHE lesson on temples. Wesley took us to the quarter prize machines for the activity to reward the boys for good Conference behavior.

Tuesday Levi woke before 6 a.m. screaming. Thankfully, we settled. He decided he wanted to run home on his own (which he usually does with us trailing behind him), so we let him try it out. This has been a very good thing. I’m proud of him for being brave, safe, and self-reliant. Lincoln kind of had a day: stole three cookies, colored his entire body (and Keller’s) with orange highlighter—including fingernails and eyelids. He moved my desk chair out of our closet and across the room to climb our tall dresser and find Wesley’s sharp pocket knife. He also said, “Mom, I memorized some of the Bob books. You read these now and just give me a prize.” We all played jaguars at home; he informed me that I can’t be a real jaguar because “Jaguars are adults when they are two years old. You are 28, so you’d be dead if you were a jaguar.” Shortly after that, the dead jaguar (me) rolled over on something soaking wet: socks that Lincoln peed on and hid under all of their sleeping blankets. This led to Keller revealing that Lincoln had peed in the closet. Not just in the closet: on seven winter (some down-filled) quilts! He had very precise aim. Each one had a spot completely soaked through. Plus probably writing his name on the wall! Did he save up all day? I tried not to lose it, but failed. While I started that process, Venice dunked herself in the toilet, Keller wailed, and Levi flooded the bathtub. I took a time out, then discovered Levi whimpering that I’d hurt his mouth—but no, his loose tooth was just dangling—and he lost it! Keller is growing and wept most of the day. Venice is learning to climb out of her crib, thanks to Lincoln.

Wednesday I went to parent/teacher conferences where Levi’s teacher told us we should be proud (we are!) and how thorough Levi is and always goes the extra mile. She says whenever she asks how something went (GT pull-outs, 2^nd grade math, etc.) he smiles, looks down and says, “It was fun…but easy.” He seems very happy at school. Phew! I told Lincoln I needed a nap (Keller had been up 7 times at night and Venice a couple) so we rested. I think he’s growing. Keller melted down over sock seams. If they ever invent seamless socks, I’m investing. This causes grief for our children. Maybe I should invent them. Venice tried to say “Love you.” She totes her blanket around and chirps cheerfully. Her favorite foots include ketchup, ranch, and salsa.

I gave up on Thursday so Keller and Lincoln played outside in underpants all day while I cooked and prepped food. Our good friend and her son ate dinner with us and the missionaries. It wasn’t what I hoped, but it wasn’t bad—and the boys all loved it. We were excited to have anyone cross paths with the missionaries, but we would really, really love this friend to have the hope and joy of the gospel. She is golden. Whenever I’m with her I just feel God’s love for her. After a lot of contemplation and resistance against the Spirit, I’ve become heavily involved in organizing my class reunion (now an 11 year). It will be Saturday, June 18—so we’ll have to leave the family reunion that day to make it to Kuna in the evening. I don’t like social gatherings; they make me nervous. I’m not good at fluffy, but I can organize and remind and encourage—so away we go. Wes told me that if I’m doing this I can’t complain. Pray that I’ll learn to enjoy it. I pulled out my senior yearbook to discover that it had never, ever been open before. I don’t think I’ll open it again either. This is a great opportunity to reconnect and grow with others though. And I’ve felt like I should do it. No more whining!

We found an Everything You Need to Know About Star Wars book at the library. Each page has been studied extensively. Lincoln found a picture of Leia in her golden ensemble. He quickly ran to me. “Mom! I just saw a bad picture of Princess Leia. I didn’t mean to. What should we do?” He decided we should cover her up with a sticky note. I’m very proud of his fast response and desire for modesty. I’m glad that he wanted to tell me about it immediately! Thank you!

Levi’s class had a field trip to the zoo on Friday. We met them there. Levi was happy to share his extensive zoo knowledge. When we hooked up with another group the adult leader was happy to have someone used to racing little boys. That night we had a babysitter come over to watch kids while we went to the temple. Bless her. The boys were so excited. Venice and Keller had both buzzed through their naps, so Venice went to bed an hour early very well. A migraine hit me on the way there. But! I didn’t pass out and I didn’t throw up. Success! Next time I will be more attentive. It was neat to be in a session with Wesley again. He’s the best. He worked and went on visits and played with the kids and kept us all sane. I’m not sure how he does it all!

Yesterday was unexpectedly productive. We found some pants for Levi (kind of a tricky process these days). We discovered the joy of an apple peeler/corer. I’ve never used one before. The kids and I were completely giddy over it; on a whim we canned some pie filling. I wasn’t prepped or anything, we were just so happy to peel apples! That night we went to the stake youth “Roadshow” with the theme “Latter-day Avengers.” The boys loved it. Keller loved it until one of the Hulks pretended like he was going to throw a chair into the audience. Then he was done. “I don’t like scary!”

Levi was on the scripture for our Sunday devotional today. He shared how Lehi read the scriptures and was filled with the Spirit. He told us that he feels the Spirit when he reads the scriptures. So wonderful. So many hopeful, beautiful moments in all of our chaos.

I loved watching the choir at women's session in General Conference: those pure, young girls! I loved Sister Reeves’s 8 different “powers.” As she spoke I visualized super heroes with the power of prayer, scriptures, temple, covenants, repentance, virtue, Sabbath day, and prophet power. I hope our family can have those super powers. President Uchtdorf is always so tender and yet straight forward. I love our leaders. What a perfect way to begin General Conference. I’m excited about our new apostles and about the good men who have gone to their next assignment. I will really miss Elder Scott. I’ve listened to almost every talk he’s given. I love his connection with his wife. I love his perspective and ability to share spiritual experiences. He has taught me so much. I love him. I’m so excited for next weekend!

My body kind of crumpled this week. I hate when that happens. Most days I was a mess to look at, but decided to try in other ways. I prayed that we would be able to serve others. A new family moved into the area: the boys helped make dinner for them and deliver it. We shared dinner with the missionaries and the kids were polite. I finished All the Light We Cannot See (on the life favorites list) and loved it so much I had to e-mail the author—which I could do through his agent and publisher. Surprisingly, he and his publisher both responded! What generosity. I’m glad we could encourage each other. So: despite not being as put together as I prefer, I’m humbled that Heavenly Father will allow us to do small things to serve Him and His children.

An older woman has been sitting outside of the library asking people to sign a petition to get something on the ballot in November. I usually try to avoid her because it’s near a parking lot, I’m chasing four little kids, and usually have about 60 books in my arms as we go in and out of the building. I finally talked with her. When I told her I’d sign but not give my contact information, she yelled and cursed and scratched out things on her papers. We thanked her for her time and efforts then left. The boys brimmed with questions. Lincoln wanted to re-enact it. Keller wanted me to tell him all the bad words. When I told them that she had taken the Lord’s name in vain, Lincoln said, “But that’s a commandment!” and Levi quoted, “Thou shalt not take the name of the Lord thy God in vain.” So we laughed and hoped the lady doesn’t feel bad at the end of the day.

Levi started attending a second grade math class this week. He loves it. His teacher gave him the end of the year first grade math assessment and he zipped through it; bless her for encouraging him and helping provide a means of further growth. Kids from the second grade class have talked to him as we go home. Yay! We met with his teacher, the principal, and the GT teacher on Tuesday. Lincoln and Keller voted to come with us instead of meeting with a friend at a park. Bless that teacher again for letting them build with Legos and explore her classroom. They built robots and tools. Levi tried to help contain them. I’m so impressed at his desire to do and be good. He’s been self-directed and emotionally controlled (he even reminds me about my penny jar!). He even made a Cinderella slipper out of paper! Last week in Primary, his class discussed reverence. On his own, he chose to bring his scriptures and other things to help him be reverent in sacrament meeting today.

Lincoln loves to be home. He loves to build and destroy. He loves to create super-hero costumes and weapons and robots. Whenever we read a book he really likes, he takes it down to the art table, studies it, and starts to draw things out of the book and plot how to build them. We read a library book on Michelangelo and his creation of David in Florence. Lincoln loved the book, loved the sculpting. Both he and Keller were fascinated by David’s lack of clothing.  When Lincoln took it downstairs I was a little concerned about what he would bring back up as drawings. Instead Keller dashed up yelling, “He drew in the library book!” So he had: right over the one picture that showed David’s entire body—strategic drawings over his chest and pelvis. When I asked Lincoln about it he responded, “Well! Our boy parts are sacred, so I covered him up!” I’m glad he heard that message, even if we need to repair a library book.

Keller wants to live in his underpants. He told me he was swimming, stripped, and then chased squirrels and planted seeds he found with Lincoln. The boys disappeared when the missionaries were here—we found them in underpants building forts. Once I came upstairs to his room to find him in nothing but nine pairs of underpants. I don’t know how he got them all on top of each other! He has read, snuggled, and sang a lot this week. He constantly brings things to Venice and tries to comfort her.

Venice wants to climb and live her own life without interference. We traded her binkies for another soft blanket of her choice. She witnessed/helped me throw her binkies into the outside garbage without any fussing. She’s done okay at night, but naps are a struggle. Then she got a fever. She’s over it now, but it was a long weekend. Our friends gave us a ton of clothes they’d outgrown for her. She loves the poofy dresses and shiny shoes. She walks around showing everyone her “shoes!”

In between, we went on a little hike, played outside, invented dinners, and (drum roll!) Wes has officially switched to a full employee. This has been in process for months and we’re really grateful to have it solidified before the end of the fiscal year (just for stability). He sweeps in every evening and saves the day—playing with the kids, running out their energy, teaching them new games, teaching me to use a drill, and being so patient and kind with all of us. What an amazing man. I’m honored to be his wife and lead our little family together.

Cole Crew

This week I started a “stay calm” jar for myself. It seems that my patience has been rather thin: or perhaps I’m just explosive. So in my scripture study I prayed to remember/learn tactics to help me train these sweet children and become the person I’m supposed to be. Thankfully God is merciful. Thankfully the Savior helps us change day by day. I wrote my calming tactics on my jar (next to the kitchen sink) to remind me. Every time I lose it, though, I have to put a penny in the jar. At the beginning of the week I did okay. Thursday I had five pennies. Then I cried for the rest of the evening. Poor Wes. Bless these forgiving kids. Since then, I had a day without any pennies and then just one. Small improvement is still improvement I guess. Keller asked me about the jar and I told him it is to help me not lose my temper. When I put a penny in the jar he asked, “When will you get your temper back?”

We can officially remove the gates on the stairs! Venice thinks she can walk down the stairs, but she eventually takes speed over novelty. Her new favorite toys are hair products. She digs in our cupboards then hauls the hair spray, mousse, and gel all over the house. I tried tying her hair out of her face. She looked in the mirror, cooed happily, then yanked them out. She tried to put it back in, but after 5 yank-outs, we moved on. She says, “More cheese!” loves ketchup, and feels that whenever someone gets a treat she should get one too, even if her hands and mouth are full.

Keller wrapped in his blanket tonight and said, “I’m a banana. A taco! A banana taco! No, just Keller.” He wants to take off all his clothes at all times. I found him behind our shed just preparing to pee in my work bucket. Another time he pulled off his clothes in the yard, “But he [our neighbor behind us] doesn’t wear a shirt outside!” Lincoln piped up, “Yeah, and he’s already seen us without clothes on. See? We’re naked!” Somehow, this didn’t make me feel much better! Keller is learning to spell his name and goes around changing, “K-E-LL-E-RRRRR!”

Lincoln is even more exciting when tired. Tired = tormentor. I hear, “I’m going to eat you!” and “If you don’t ________, I’m going to _________ you!” We finished an audio book where the characters go into the fairy tale world. He loves the fairy godmother. He wanted to be the fairy godmother, but decided just to be her helper instead. He has been waving magic wands, turning people into pumpkins, battling dragons, and closing inter-world portals all week. “Where do we live? Where does Grandma live?” Pause. “Well! I am going to close the portal between Arvada and Logan and Kuna and we will never, NEVER see Grandma again!” Oh, dear. It’s devastating for all of us, especially the little actor. The fairy godmother’s helper is also well equipped with weapons. He found the box of cookies, took them and Keller to hide in another room and eat them. Then he found a popsicle while I was downstairs. He cut it open and let it melt all over the crack between the stove and the counter. He left it because he remembered that he was drawing a robot car powered by a missile…Let’s not forget my favorite moment of the week: I walked into Venice’s room to get her going for the day and there he was “reading” the Book of Mormon to her and explaining the pictures.

Levi impresses me so much in his self-control. It’s so nice to know what is going on during the day and how he feels. I love hearing his stories and inventions. I love his excitement about “short surprise math tests!” Monday he brought his homework folder home, sat at the table (without prompting), and finished the week’s worth of homework in fifteen minutes. “Explain to me exactly what “setting” means, Mom.” On Friday he school hosted a “fun run” for each grade. They set up an oval track, turned music on loud, and invited parents/family to come and cheer them on for forty minutes while they ran in a circle high-fiving a darling 6^th grader dressed as an eagle (their mascot) and their P.E. teacher. The principal jogged around all day with grades K-6. Levi loved showing me and Lincoln the people he knows. And he finally started playing with a boy in his class. He’s really excited about it. His Wednesday afternoon Nature Center class makes him so excited his face flushes. This week they learned about temperature and weather. He learned a lot after he realized that his friend was already there and he didn’t have to stop the teacher or the class to wait for Xander. Loyalty is one of Levi’s amazing qualities.

When we went to the library on Friday, Levi saw advertisements for a showing of the new Cinderella. He was so excited he took one of the bookmarks and made copies of it at home. So we went. Lincoln and Levi were entranced, (Levi woke this morning grinning, “Mom, I’ve decided I’m going to marry Cinderella…” in a dreamy voice. Lincoln: “How did she turn her staff into a ice-wand? I’m going to do that!”) After about an hour into the movie Keller wanted to know why the mice hadn’t sung, “Cinderelly!” We don’t often do movies; I think it was an overall enjoyable experience. They all sat on my lap for the majority of the film—that took a while to walk off! Wes stayed home and played with Venice while he worked.

During scripture study, Wes read about the hailstorms that will destroy the crops. This inspired us to recommit to our food storage (we used it all up in preparation to move). We’re not quite up to our three-month supply, but we’ll get there. I’m so glad he wants to follow the counsel of the prophets and the promptings he receives.

In other news, we invited a family over for apple crisp. We’ve never met them and they rarely come to church—so they came and we enjoyed each other. One afternoon I started a small fire in the oven—not huge, but enough to scare us and require a nice long cleaning of the oven. We went to the temple and have decided to take time with our kids there to teach so that they know that the temple is a place of learning. They loved touching the white temple. Today we attempted our first “Sunday devotional” as a family and are pleased to announce that it went better than anticipated: Wes shared something he learned during personal study, I gave a 5 minute devotional on prayer, we sang a song, and off we went. I requested a bunch of my ancestor’s patriarchal blessings; they came in the mail this week. I feel so privileged to read them and to be part of these wonderful people. I’ve been thinking and reading about some difficult challenges others face. I feel so grateful for our current blessings and time of peace. I know that our own trials will come, but I’ve decided to not be afraid and to take Jacob’s advice and not stumble because of “over-anxieties.” If God believes we’re capable of mortal experience, I’m very willing to trust Him and hold on tight.

Happy Easter! And Happy Conference! What a great way to celebrate the resurrection and Heavenly Father’s plan for us. All week we have studied Christ’s last week during the boys’ personal scripture time. Keller runs around pretending to wave palm leaves shouting “Hosanna!” Lincoln wants me to be the donkey. We dyed Easter eggs yesterday; they enjoyed the prospect of it, but the reality was only eh. Tomorrow our neighbors and friends are coming over for an FHE egg hunt in the yard.  

Don’t you love Conference? Levi was so excited he shivered. He kept comparing the speakers with the pictures on the wall of the apostles. They thought President Uchtdorf’s German conducting was hilarious. We missed hearing more from President Monson and Elder Scott. Levi concluded the day by informing us that he’s going to grow up to be an apostle and the prophet. “I’ll do a pretty good job.” Lincoln said maybe he’d work for Levi, but he still thinks “Satan has a nice face” (in the New Testament stories book)...The boys did awesome this Conference. We even heard some of it! As always we look forward to reading the talks over. I’m so grateful we have six months to study and digest it. It is like the Savior telling us to go to our homes and ponder His words, try to master them, then come back on the morrow for more. I love that “saints are sinners who keep trying.” Phew! I love my Savior.

Of course the rest of the week can’t compare to Easter and Conference.

Wesley was in Houston from Monday until late Wednesday for a conference on clean power plants. We missed him, but this was a really quick trip. I was almost surprised when he returned. I love having him around. He brought us home fruit twists from HEB (the Texas grocery store) because I love them. (Whenever I start feeling lonely for Texas I think of scorpions near my babies and big hissing cockroaches and no mountains…then I feel better). Wes is the best. I love that we see him so often. I love that he’ll work extra so I can volunteer in Levi’s class. I love that when he’s home, he’s 100% home. I love that he talks to me about work and that we counsel about everything. Perhaps this would drive other people nuts—but I learn more about him every day and I know in 10 years I’ll be even crazier about him than I am now. If that’s possible!

While he was gone, the inspection for our new house happened. The girl who was going to watch Keller and Lincoln slept through her alarm and doorbell, so my friend took Levi to school and kept Lincoln with her. As we drove out, Keller screamed, “I WANT TO STAY WITH CHERYL! I WANT TO STAY WITH CHERYL!” She’s completely won them over. Keller played very happily in the house and Venice was happy once I put her down. Thankfully: no major problems! Buying a house means buying a list of exciting projects. So…if anyone is interested in helping us knock down a wall or push out our fence in the next little while, we’ll feed and house you! I met the owner. He seemed really nice. He told us that the area has a ton of little kids and they’ve loved it for the last 20 years.

One of the best moments of the week happened when Levi woke then ran to give me a big hug and kiss. That night when I was in and out with screaming Keller, Levi rolled over and said, “Mom, I want to hug and kiss you!” Thank you, Levi! He struggled readjusting to school, but loved the weekend. He helped clean up and helped take care of Venice and just helped. He read a book then helped Keller pretend to read it. Super cute. Such a good, emotional boy.

Lincoln, oh Lincoln, how do you live? He left a wave of destruction behind him. Not that this is abnormal. This week the wave just felt huge. If we were characters in a picture book, he would be the one running through with scissors cutting the world apart. And then he smiles, and I think: Did he really just hit me with that shovel? Did he really just shove Keller over and beat him with a stick? Did he really just steal all the baby toys and hide them? “I’m not going on a mission. I’m going to marry Venice and kiss her on the mouth!” For his personal time he wanted to fold clothes and pack, though. That was awesome. He’s quite the help.

Keller has been gunky but happy. Screaming but “I okay.” Mischievous and dangerous. He climbs into Nissy’s crib and jumps. She’s not a fan. I’m not a fan. I swatted his bum so hard I almost cried. I hate doing that. I’ve given up keeping clothes on him except when we eat and when we go out. He comes out of a nap in only underpants when I put him down fully clothed. He willingly puts them on when he’s hungry—which is often lately. I think he’s growing. We spent three nights screaming that his legs and arms hurt. And when he’s tired he runs into things—so his toe bleeds, his knee bleeds, his back hurts. Oh yes, and Lincoln shut the door on him, which resulted in a huge black-yellow bruise.

Venice is also gunky but happy. She officially crawls! Forward! She started yesterday. Today she crawled out of the toy room, into the hall, and into the bathroom when she heard the tub going. I can’t keep her sitting because she needs to move. She can’t eat because she’s so distracted by the wonderful world around her. She joins the chorus of loud ruckus. I’m glad we’re moving so she can crawl more safely. She’s such a sweet little creature, and part of the crew!

We’re a circus over here: happy, sticky, and out there. Buy tickets to the show.