Levi Bug

So Grateful

"[...] I am crazier than shirttails

In the wind, when you're near, a wind that blows from

The big blue sea, so shiny so deep and so unlike us;"

--Kenneth Koch, "To You"

Today is Wesley's 24th birthday. I thank his parents! I thank the world! And I thank Heavenly Father for such a wonderful man! (Yes, the exclamation points are merited).

He woke up this morning a little after 3 a.m., a tad after I returned to bed (mid-morning fiesta with Levi), then left about 4 a.m. to drive to the airport for his 6 a.m. flight to Austin, Texas. Happy birthday. Actually, we're all very excited about Texas because we can compare it to Penn State of two weeks ago (a marvelous experience in itself. We could have a cow!). And the Longhorns offered Wesley more money. And because Austin's housing market is lower than Provo. And because it's warm (okay, that's just me). Mostly because they have a lot of projects that Wes thrills over. (We're still waiting to hear from MIT; we don't know anyone who has heard yet and assume we're on a waiting list).

So yes. I've spent the day trying to be busy and not think about the fact that he won't be back tonight. I celebrate his opportunities. Our favorite thing to do is simple, though: be together. (I would not be a good military wife although I realize some relationships thrive on it).

I often think about how my life would be different without Wesley. Then I pray and cry because I am so happy. Sappy. I hate that I can't articulate what matters most (relationships with God and Wes and family). Every morning I wake up and think (even now after almost three years) "WOW! We're married! How can I ask for anything ever again? This is the best!" I am even more grateful when I think of others I might have married, then I wonder how I could have imagined myself with them. I honestly believe that Heavenly Father put Wesley in the same place and the same time so that we would start our life and family together; my gratitude increases daily. Wesley is prioritized, honest, tender, and good. Before anything else I felt spiritually drawn to him. Happily I report that my love continues to increase and usually I feel like I'll burst with joy for living with such a devoted husband and father, such a thoughtful and intelligent man. We thrive on our distinctly different perspectives and experiences. If anything ever happens to Wesley, I will endure (as cheerfully as I can) and rejoice in our eternal life together. Oh, how I adore my Wesley Joseph.

Happy birthday and goodnight.

Lost Time and Sanity: Can't Post

Have a picture. Or two.

As Wes says: "Cassie is currently out of order."

Back in the Swing

It seems like seven years since I've actually made dinner, or breathed, or really savored the chance I have to sit down at our sweet little table at night with my husband and son and revel in my gratitude for them.

Last night I was back to inventing recipes.

Levi gobbled up corn bread crumbles while Wesley and I enjoyed the beautiful flowers he brought home Wednesday (I'm spoiled).

And then, we cleaned up, sang songs, and bundled into bed. (After I won a game of Monopoly).

Life is very, very good.

Thesis Defense: Passed!

We shared a lively two hour conversation.

I flubbered all over my words--but did okay.

I repeated myself too much--but did okay.

I didn't anticipate the intense focus on my short pieces--but did okay.

And when it was all over, I came home, tired, to people I love.

I need snacks. Or recipes.

I'm trying to find healthy snack food. Any ideas?

You're Invited

“I learned the power of language to map a life, to overcome distance,to focus attention on what matters most” (Sanders 161).

“The words hardly ever lived up to what I remembered or imagined, but every now and again they did, for a line or two, and those rare successes kept me trying” (Sanders 282).

Scott Russell Sanders, A Private History of Awe

Levi has been balancing on his hands and knees then rocking back and forth back and forth. But he has to wait until Thursday. Why?

Well, I'm defending my thesis on Wednesday from noon to two. That's why. Hurray!

If you have any practice questions, please share. Hopefully I can articulate myself clearly.