Annual Letter (In case we missed you by e-mail. Forgive us and let us know!)

The Cole Family

2013 Annual Letter

Dear Friends,

We’ve lived in Austin, Texas for almost four years now. Wesley will finish his doctorate in chemical engineering at UT-Austin next summer. He has applied to multiple professor positions—so who knows where or what we’ll be doing in the next year! (For those interested, his work emphasizes energy systems, dynamic modeling, and optimization.) He has been able to work with the 14-and-15-year-old Boy Scouts almost the whole time we’ve been here—which means he’s enjoyed a lot of camping, weekly activities, and mentoring young men. Thankfully I’ve been able to stay home with our three darling, vocal boys, thoroughly savoring (and growing from) our daily adventures. Levi turned four this year and began speech therapy preschool. He loves it! His articulation has improved significantly just since September. Lincoln, almost three, sweetly and mischievously takes care of all of us; he’s happy as long as he has a screwdriver or a hammer nearby. Keller, 14 months, changed from a baby to a little boy quickly—eager to participate in explorations his brothers’ lead, walking, climbing, singing. We love our life.

This year exploded with excitement from the beginning. Here are some of the major highlights.

•   After almost ten years, we met up Katai, my friend from Thailand. I wondered when we last parted in high school if we’d ever see each other again; now I have more hope. The boys loved her and tried to speak Thai for a few weeks following.
• We visited the Texas Military Museum. We all loved it, especially Wesley (picture at right).
•  This summer we finally went to Austin’s famous Bat Bridge and saw the bats fly out across the river at dusk. The boys still watch for the bats when the sun sets.
• We bought a year pass to the Children’s Museum/Thinkery where we sort fake food, pretend to milk cows, throw golf balls, watch trains…
• Levi and Lincoln led the initiative to buy a “shovel for the boys.” We saved money, shopped, and purchased the perfect tool. Levi and Lincoln carried it all over The Colorado River Wildlife Reserve when we planted some trees with a group of Wesley’s colleagues (picture at left). I carried Keller who waits eagerly for his own shovel.
•  In July we piled in our trusty van for a two and a half day trip across Texas, to Boise, down to Logan, then St. George, and back home to Austin. What a blast! We loved spending time with our siblings, parents, and grandparents, reacquainting cousins, and seeing those gorgeous mountains. We even stopped briefly at BYU, parking at the little house where we lived south of campus and walking up to the Clyde Building.
• Keller surprised us by doing quite well camping—even if it rained all night and the next morning!
• A few months ago we switched to cloth diapers. We’re not going back!
•   One of my essays was published in the literary nonfiction journal Fourth Genre. It will be a long time before I write or publish for a while—but I’m pleased to have a little dream fulfilled with Fourth Genre.
• Wesley attended seven conferences in six months and worked diligently in general and specific. This semester he co-taught “Energy Technology and Policy” with his professor Dr. Edgar. All of this has confirmed that we made the right decision in coming to UT-Austin.
•  Every month we were able to attend the temple in San Antonio. We are so glad to live close to a temple where we can worship and be more united with our family.

In between the major happenings are many joyous small happenings that teach us to move forward one day at a time. We’re learning to answer the “Oh. Why?” questions—and we’re learning to think carefully before we answer. They often gather around the piano, singing, playing, leading the music. Or they turn the piano bench into a landfill, or a diving board, or a fire engine, or a hero cave. Since we don’t have a TV, Wesley introduced the boys to some media—including “Plants vs. Zombies”!—which means our imaginative play takes on exciting twists. We play soccer, tennis, football, basketball, and a few games they invent like “Ticky-tacky-toe” (no X’s or O’s involved) and “Flippy-Flop.” We terrorize the poor library staff by parading in weekly and checking out a shelf or two of books; yes, we’re the reason they recently enforced a book limit of 50. Also thanks to the library, we’ve discovered puppet shows, magnetic puzzles, story time, new music, and wonderful people.

Somehow each day melts away in meals, outside, stories, rest, school, meetings, and family time. Raising a family is really about all of us lifting each other and forgiving when mistakes inevitably occur. The days and weeks and now year are full of miracles and mayhem—we are grateful for both. The chaos and calm have increased our awareness of how much Heavenly Father cares for us and that we have worthwhile work to do.   

Happy holidays.

Wesley, Cassie, J. Levi, Lincoln, and Keller

2013 Favorite Books

Wes: The 7Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey, The Lincoln Biographies by Carl Sandburg

Cassie: Parenting with Love and Logic by Foster Cline and Jim Fay, When Women Were Birds by Terry Tempest Williams, Bomb:            

            The Race to Build—and Steal—the World's Most Dangerous Weapon by Steve Sheinkin

Boys: The Lion and the Mouse by Jerry Pinkney, Trains Go by Steve Light, The Three Billy Goats Gruff (named Levi, Lincoln, and Keller with Mom acting as Troll)

Another Week in Wonderland

Wesley is giving his 60 (plus) students their final. After they’re done, he’ll grade the tests and focus on research until January! We made over 100 cookies for the students to offer support (or comfort?). After the final he’ll go straight to the airport and fly to Colorado. He interviews with NREL tomorrow for the Director’s Fellowship and will return late tomorrow night. Exciting! Any other person might cancel the weekly tutoring session with one of the young men in the ward. Wesley met with him this morning after seminary to help him prep for finals. No wonder blessings rain in on us; Wesley is unflappable! University of Illinois at Urbana-Champaigne contacted Wesley to schedule an interview in April. They’re filling multiple positions and assume he’s doing a post-doc (which is a good assumption). He’s excited about this possibility. Illinois is rated 11^th or so and it’s a smaller town. We’ll see what happens! It feels good to be contacted if nothing else!

Yesterday the young men’s president in our ward was called to the stake level. So, the young men’s presidency (Wesley as first councilor) was released. Only the president was called. They asked him to keep acting in position until the positions are filled. Who knows what will happen? We can’t really remember life without mutual and youth meetings.

In general, the week was one of many miracles and much destruction. The usual, I guess—but it all still surprises me. Like when my visiting teachers stop by in the middle of dinner while Wesley’s rushing out the door, then Lincoln throws a plate of manicotti across the table into my lap—what do you do? Carry on! Grateful for the visiting teachers, for the meeting, for Lincoln, and yes, grateful for that manicotti. My mothering report card scored pretty low in general, though. I’m hoping Heavenly Father is chuckling rather than reconsidering His inspiration to us to raise children! Last Monday what began as a routine potty-break amounted to the glass broken out of our bathroom cabinet door. I never worried about these cupboards because I didn’t think anyone could get the panes out! I was wrong! They unloaded the pantry in front of the garage door just as we were trying to leave (and smashed the cereals with cans!). They played volleyball with the tree. Ran away outside in shorts and no shoes in 35 degrees…and we still slipped into Wesley’s colleague’s celebration lunch and then spent 3 hours or so taking a family to their pediatrician. (we didn’t catch the pneumonia, I’m grateful! And amazed!) I determined not to be such a high strung, nasty creature after Monday and overall succeeded.

The Thinkery (once called the Children’s Museum) reopened. Wow! We’re glad we have a membership because we might make this a weekly adventure. They have an entire outdoor adventure zone. A room dedicated to lights and shadows (picture a room-size Night Bright). A room dedicated to “currents” and water works (we left soaked despite the waterproof aprons). A mini-marketplace. A reading room. And we didn’t get to the rest. Tons of stuff is just the right shape and size for toddlers—this is a much friendlier addition. Keller loved it. Lincoln loved it. Levi loved it. Heck. Even I didn’t want to leave!

As a family we went caroling on Tuesday and delivered treats to friends on Thursday. Our neighbors were all very shocked over the caroling. “We didn’t know people still did this!” We feel more Christmasy now. Saturday evening we went to the Pflugerville Christmas parade. Some of the youth in our ward marched in the band so we cheered them on. The boys came home with 20 times more candy than they ever imagined at Halloween. Plus a foam football! They loved the lights, floats, costumes, even the cold (okay 50ish degrees but windy).

On Wednesday our neighbor knocked on the door with her arms laden with coats and sweaters in Levi’s size. Her grandson had grown out of them. How did she know we needed them? We just haven’t been able to go shopping. Her kindness was such a tender mercy for me. Heavenly Father does not forget or forsake us! Levi loves the coat, too.

Levi loves his new underpants. They are all white. He chose them because they look the most like garments. He likes to pair them up and roll them the same way I roll ours. He woke during the night just so excited about them. The next morning he discussed his mission and learning Spanish. “I want to go to New York City, but I will let the prophets decide.” Good choice! His PALS preschool ended the year with a Polar Express theme day. They all wore their pajamas and came home with a bell necklace. If that’s not exciting, tell me what is. He led us in caroling, which everyone appreciated. When we opened some of Grandma Cole’s Christmas books, Levi ran to couch and spent a good chunk of time pouring over them.

While Levi was at preschool, Lincoln, Keller and I went visiting teaching. This woman taught preschool for 25 years, collects Amish-made decorations, and loves family history. She slathered Lincoln with attention. In turn, he let her carry him all over and asked her darling questions. I think they’re bosom buddies now. He’s starting to feel better. When we finished reading The Best Nest Lincoln pointed to the Mom, Dad, Baby Keller Bird, and told us that Levi and Lincoln were out running. Of course. He’s been “hunting” a lot lately and sword fighting, “I am cutting off your leg Mom!” Levi runs in, “But I am a hero and will save you!” Follow the warrior cries.

These two also have friends named Baba (the mom) and NunNun (the dad). I think they are large birds? Baba and NunNun recently had a baby and moved this week. Levi and Lincoln acted as the moving crew and welcoming committee complete with brining them meals. Lincoln carried a hammer and a “pie.” Ha!

Keller walks, dances, and is close to running. He woke on Saturday night for three hours to stroll around his crib and giggle (then only took one 20 minute nap on Sunday! What are our kids made of?). He’s so proud of himself; as he should be. When the big boys go hunting they put underpants on their head for facemasks. So Keller found some and balanced them on his head. When they fell off, he pulled them back on. He even attacked me with a “sword.” He put his first HEBuddyBuck into the machine today for a sticker (at the grocery store) and gleefully put the sticker on his shirt. He wants to eat cookies. And more cookies. When angry he flails and screams, but he’s learned to roll softly on the tile and then scream rather than head-banging directly. Good grief. I don’t even respond! He loves his toothbrush. Every day he searches out pens and paper. And he sings, sings, sings. He pees in the potty at least once a day. What he really likes is to roll away during a diaper change and sit on the rug in front of the potty, wait for me to scramble, then pee all over the rug. Goofball. Welcome to the circus, little man!

We felt ambitious (hopeful? Spirited?) on Monday when we put up the Christmas tree for FHE. After a lesson on how the tree points heavenward and remains evergreen and thus points us to Jesus and how we can become like Heavenly Father, we reinforced the importance of tree safety. The ornaments are not balls. They are not Frisbees. They are not dolls. They are not puppets. They should stay on the tree and not be hidden around the house. The tree is a special decoration; therefore, no climbing, shaking, or general rowdiness around it. Did we cover everything? Probably not thoroughly enough. The deal was that if the tree got hurt or became dangerous we’d move it from the living room to our bedroom. Deal. They danced giddily around it. They did pull off and hide a few ornaments. Keller climbed the tree and tried to wrap himself in the ribbon. Levi loves the ornament he made his first year in nursery, so he spent a lot of time taking it off and putting it on. Everyone remained generally gentle—the tree and the stockings even made it through book group on Thursday night!—until last night. The weather dropped this week from 83 to 28, so the last few days have been a lot of shivering inside time (Texas homes are not made for heating!). Inside = crazy. The stockings were pulled down the stair banisters. The flag football stuff (including grass and sweaty man remnants) dumped all over the living room floor. The cloth nativity from Rosey scattered in various corners of the house. In the middle of baking a zillion rolls for the ward Christmas party, I found Lincoln yanking on the tree ribbon (too late). Crash goes the tree. Thankfully no one was hurt and only a few ornaments broke. The tree lives in our room now. Wesley’s surprised that it made it this long. I guess I need to adjust my expectations because I felt weepy while I vacuumed up the needles. This morning when the boys ran in our room Levi lost it over the tree’s new location. Lincoln sheepishly smiled then said, “But I pulled it over. The tree fell. So it can’t be downstairs.” Having it upstairs may make the home a bit more peaceful. Maybe we can even put presents under it without concern of thorough destruction. Maher-shalal-hash-baz: destruction is imminent. Maybe we should have added that in the naming? Haha. Life with boys; I always wanted adventure!

We went to the doctor on Monday for Keller. He had a rattling cough for over ten days and I wanted to make sure he was okay (last time he had a double ear infection). To our relief, he’s fine aside from a bad cold/allergies that turned into teething. Teething means lots of diarrhea, drool, congestion…so the fun continues at a mild level. Lincoln had a low fever on Monday and Tuesday. He’s been recovering all week. Moving slower seems to annoy him a lot. Surprise!

Most of what happened this week included all three musketeers. Something clicked between them. They’re all heavily involved in pretend and play. We all bundled up and ran to the park (Keller squealing in delight) when the temperature dropped. Wesley left for mutual Wednesday and Lincoln dumped out all the Legos so he and Keller could attack each other with the bucket. Meanwhile, Levi decided to rebuild the vacuum—which resulted in the filter/bucket emptied all over the kitchen floor. I note these things because they have become normal. At the end of the day I try to figure out what happened and what survived. They know how to battle hard: prepared for the last days! I’ll count my blessings.

Keller walks all over. He walks about ten steps, plops, starts over. He gleefully joined the full fun in nursery. He sings, and sings, and sings. Due to the added rest song today, he made it all the way through sacrament meeting. He loves pens and he loves throwing things. In church he really loves throwing pens and rushing to get them before he’s removed from the premises. I think people are starting to gather around our pew for entertainment.

Lincoln still runs around saying, “I’m killing_______” [everything] and has added, “I’m going to destroy ________” [everything]. I’m grateful for boys. What would I do with a princess? I’d have to put her in armor and teach her sword fighting before she could crawl. I found a stash of toy screws and nails in his pockets in every load of laundry this week. Despite the weather, Lincoln insists on shorts. He wore bright red shorts and cowboy boots to the ward party last night (“My boots will keep me warm. See? I’m a cowboy.”) My hopes of this teaching him that he needs to dress for the weather didn’t quite succeed this time!

Levi said the prayer in Primary today. He wanted me to stand there prompting him because other moms do. He loves being in front of a crowd, but I think he felt a little nervous for this. Super cute. He woke early (5:30ish) and excited on Monday, rushing to get ready for the day because he had a “meeting” he had to get to on time. Hilarious. In his spare time he plots out his checkers moves. “I’m going to try harder and beat Dad again!”

Yesterday morning we shopped to supplement a family’s Christmas. The boys loved it. This is one of my favorite traditions. I’m glad that the boys look forward to it as well. We followed that by tithing settlement, Wes working, people over for writing stuff, ward party, and falling into bed.

This week was crazy for Wesley. On Monday he taught an OpenStudio workshop at 8 a.m. On Tuesday he picked up the seminar speaker (Tariq Samad who he has met a few times at conferences) and helped him around campus. Tuesday nights he tutors. Wednesday was mutual and an attempt to research. Thursday was the department seminar that Wesley completely organized. The president of a lobbying company who is a Chemical Engineer, Stu Van Scoyoc, visited from Washington D.C. Wesley had people lined up to meet with him all day, plus during breakfast, lunch, and dinner, plus his seminar. Coordinating all of this took a lot of time and effort—all well worth it. Van Scoyoc is very warm, open, and friendly. Wesley learned a lot about policy making and how science funding (etc.) works on the Washington end. He intended to work all Friday grading his student papers (it takes about three days), but a new family moved in Friday at 10. Wesley will serve and sacrifice whenever there’s a need. It’s a good thing he went because only he and one other man could help them move a houseful and 30 years of accumulation up three flights of stairs. In 30 degree weather with ice warnings. He meant to be home at 11. When the boys and I returned from visiting teaching coordination stuff, he wasn’t home. I started calling at noon. No answer. No answer. By one I had worked myself up into a fit thinking he might be smashed and alone and frozen somewhere. Maybe I need to calm down? He was two hours late and hadn’t answered a lot of calls, though. Poor man. I’ve repented of my screechiness. Bless him for forgiving me.

We also heard this week that Wesley has been selected as a finalist for the NREL Director’s Fellowship. He almost didn’t even apply for it! They want to make a final decision by the end of December, so he’ll be flying out there soon to interview. We’re not sure of the details yet. Exciting stuff!

We carry on! Love you.

Cole Crazies