(last week's letter)

Wes came home with fever and chills and another strain of gunk. We prayed that we could all be well enough to go to church together. So off we went this morning. We walked through the doors and their noses cleared up. We stopped coughing. No crazy trips to the bathroom for anyone. We stayed all three blocks. When the boys and I returned home (Wes had meetings) their noses drained again. When Wes walked through the door, his chills returned. (We feel better this evening.) What a miracle! We decided we needed to exercise true faith and increase our gratitude and education through being sick—and we’re given great gifts. Amazingly enough, we’ve all been gross yet able to plug away (avoiding human contact). We’ll count our blessings.

Keller had his 4-week appointment. He is over 10.5 pounds. Yes: he has gained close to 3 since birth! He’s a chunk and loves eating. I’m worried about some reflux issues, though. He’s been losing everything. He’s fighting our sickness(es) as well, but pulling through thus far. He touched Lincoln’s cheek while flailing. Lincoln held his hand to his cheek, smiling, saying, “Keller touch cheek! Again! Again!” With attention like that, our Keller feller continues to thrive.

I covered Lincoln with a blanket in the middle of the night, he rolled over murmuring, “Motorcycle!” dreamily. He pretends to sleep with his eyes squished shut, then he opens them shouting, “AWAKE!”  He loves dancing—particularly to the ABCs. We blasted some music and twirled around the house. “Again! Again!” When we start counting (for any reason) he picks up on the numbers and speeds us forward. I have given the “keeping up” with him part to our angelic host. My goal is simply to help him survive to age 5. Anything beyond that we consider sprinkles (which he discovered and loves).

Shouting seems to have increased since Keller’s birth. And screaming. I try to be patient. But after long and varied approaches to our “outside voices” I finally put Levi in a time out in the backyard. He stressed about his socks getting dirty. He’s such a steady big brother and a huge help (sorting laundry, organizing everything, checking on the baby as soon as he wakes up). We all want to test the boundaries sometimes. He told me this week that he plays with his toys in bed at night when he “has a hard time going to sleep.” I wondered what that sound was.

We took dinner to a sister in the ward. She told me she had a dog in passing; I forgot. Levi and Lincoln clutched each other as they slowly ascended the scary cement stairs to her complex (in the dark!) while I balanced dinner and screaming Keller. They all listened very attentively, staying close to me. Then she opened the door, the dog ran out, growling, barking, and jumping all over them. So I had three boys screaming and climbing up me frantically (with good reason) while trying not to slosh soup or drop anyone. The lady finally took the food and I scooped up my boyos as she shut the door. I don’t know that I built any friendships that evening. Levi and Lincoln regrouped, we all hugged and breathed, and they calmly recounted the experience to Wes when he came home from work. They really are so brave. I’m proud of them. Despite their fear, they tried to protect the food, too. They tried not to scream but to say, “help me,” (as practiced) instead. What sweet boys.

I saw my gynecologist this week and all looks well. I had to have an eye exam to renew my glasses prescription. In both appointments people asked me if we’re done having kids. I sure hope not. I know it probably sounds crazy—but we feel more complete with Keller around. Our third little dude just increases our excitement and anticipation for any others we might have. People look at me like, “You’re 25 with three kids three and under and you actually want more? And more than one more? Good luck, honey.” We all wish each other well. And some days I need all the luck they can wish. Thankfully, we just follow the Spirit and pray for daily guidance knowing somehow we’ll make it one day at a time.