In the wind, when you're near, a wind that blows from
The big blue sea, so shiny so deep and so unlike us;"
--Kenneth Koch, "To You"
Today is Wesley's 24th birthday. I thank his parents! I thank the world! And I thank Heavenly Father for such a wonderful man! (Yes, the exclamation points are merited).
He woke up this morning a little after 3 a.m., a tad after I returned to bed (mid-morning fiesta with Levi), then left about 4 a.m. to drive to the airport for his 6 a.m. flight to Austin, Texas. Happy birthday. Actually, we're all very excited about Texas because we can compare it to Penn State of two weeks ago (a marvelous experience in itself. We could have a cow!). And the Longhorns offered Wesley more money. And because Austin's housing market is lower than Provo. And because it's warm (okay, that's just me). Mostly because they have a lot of projects that Wes thrills over. (We're still waiting to hear from MIT; we don't know anyone who has heard yet and assume we're on a waiting list).
So yes. I've spent the day trying to be busy and not think about the fact that he won't be back tonight. I celebrate his opportunities. Our favorite thing to do is simple, though: be together. (I would not be a good military wife although I realize some relationships thrive on it).
I often think about how my life would be different without Wesley. Then I pray and cry because I am so happy. Sappy. I hate that I can't articulate what matters most (relationships with God and Wes and family). Every morning I wake up and think (even now after almost three years) "WOW! We're married! How can I ask for anything ever again? This is the best!" I am even more grateful when I think of others I might have married, then I wonder how I could have imagined myself with them. I honestly believe that Heavenly Father put Wesley in the same place and the same time so that we would start our life and family together; my gratitude increases daily. Wesley is prioritized, honest, tender, and good. Before anything else I felt spiritually drawn to him. Happily I report that my love continues to increase and usually I feel like I'll burst with joy for living with such a devoted husband and father, such a thoughtful and intelligent man. We thrive on our distinctly different perspectives and experiences. If anything ever happens to Wesley, I will endure (as cheerfully as I can) and rejoice in our eternal life together. Oh, how I adore my Wesley Joseph.
Happy birthday and goodnight.
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